Thursday, 29 August 2013

With apologies to Flann O'Brien

Keats and Chapman were driving through France endeavoring to enjoy the scenery and customs afforded by that historic country. Unfortunately the friends' chronic lack of funds made their travel arrangements less than satisfactory, especially for Keats who criticized Chapman's purchase of a clapped out Citroën Acadiane, “We would have been better off with an ass and cart; this frightful jalopy is bound to break down.”
Chapman reproached his companion's lack of faith in French engineering. At which point the gear-box fell out.
A dépanneur eventually arrived to take the defunct vehicle away. As the two ex-tourists watched their van being loaded on to a trailer Keats turned to Chapman and pointedly observed, “What we have here is a fourgon conclusion.”


Monday, 5 August 2013

Double dactyl poem

(Nessie fans, generally)
Like to point out

That what we thought we saw
Was not a duck, but a
Splashing about.